Thursday, September 22, 2005

Afternoon Edition - 9/22/05

Katrina Exits; Rita On Her Way
With winds said to be over 165 mph, hurricane Rita is said to be a category 5 storm with the power to cause equal devastation as her predecessor, Katrina. The Gulf Coast has 1,036 people reported dead from Katrina; the house-to-house search after Katrina has not been completed. The search for bodies will continue another four to six weeks. Rita is expected to make landfall tomorrow morning with a disaster path that is said to rip Texas, Louisiana and Oklahoma a new one. Presently, 1.3 million Texas and Louisiana residents have been ordered to evacuate their homes.

Nasty; Men Worse Than Women
Microbiologists have made a crappy discovery – folks don’t really like washing their hands after using the bathroom. After a careful national bathroom habits observation, it was found that 75% men wash their hands after using the T-room, while 82% of women took soap and water to their hands after doing the do in the ladies room. Remarkably a telephone survey showed that 91% of folks allege to wash their hands every time they use the bathroom. Want to know the nastiest of them all? That would be male sports fans who were observed washing their hands only 26% of the time after using the lavatory. San Francisco was found to be the cleanest city with 88% of the folks observed washing their hands after leaving the bathroom.

What’s Do The Numbers Say About Affairs?
It is estimated that 25-33% of all men AND women have affairs. When affairs are discovered, statistics show that 65% of marriages end; choosing not to work it out. Only 3% of folks in affairs choose to marry – of those 75% end in divorce. Surveys have also shown that only 5% of men will admit to cheating, while females admit to their straying ways 15% of the time. It was also found that 1 in 3 married men take off their wedding rings when they go out without their wives. Are you wondering how many of those cheating men got caught? Try 80%. The single biggest breach of trust reported was when the cheating spouse / partner became emotionally involved, as opposed to (or in addition to) physically involved.

On Blast
The Mega Million lottery was recently $250 million dollars. Many dreamed of winning the pot and living a new luxurious life. If you were the winner, what is the FIRST thing you would buy? Why?

Keep passin’ the open windows…

8 comments:

Unknown said...

The first thing I would do is buy me out of DEBT!!!! Pay all of my bills and my mother's bills.

~Ms.Kahlua~ said...

Probably a tank of GAS for all my family and friends!!!!! Followed by getting us all out of debt!

Unknown said...

I'd buy a new heart... the one I have is broken... LOL

DRAMA! Truth is, I'd take care of immediate family and close (and I mean close BEFORE I hit the jackpot)friends.

I'd then have my personal SWAN-type makeover and bust my whole shyt up! ... think first wives club meets Mystique on X-Men.

Last I would establish world peace.... uh, I just thought it was the right thing to say. :)

Unknown said...

BTW... I think we had that On Blast question.... does anyone else remember? I'm getting old, feeble and forgetful!

Anonymous said...

1st payoff my dad's house.

2nd $2MM in fund that makes $
from of interest to keep $
multiplying.

3rd set-up a trust for my daughter

4th set-up a will/trust for both
my sisters.

5th invest $ in stock market

6th payoff my debt

7th buy a building provide
moderate rent.

Krissy

Unknown said...

I think it's hysterical that so many of you thought of giving winnings from gambling (which is what the lottery is) to a church or ministry. For the record, no respectable church should/would ever accept tides, offerings or donations from gambling winnings.

Krissy... leave it to you to build low-income ghetto projects with your winnings! LOL :)

Whew... wait a minute I'm having trouble breathing!

Anonymous said...

AFTER COMING BACK FROM A HAWAII VACATION, I'LL GET A PERSONAL BANKING ADVISOR AND A TAX ATTORNEY.

PS TO HECTOR: YOUI ARE INCORRECT ABOUT A "REPUTABLE" CHURCH NOT ACCEPTING TIDINGS FROM "GAMBLING". BOY I LIVE IN ATLANTA, THE BAPTIST BIBLE-BELTED SOUTH.....HOME OF THOSE MEGGA CHURCHES HOLDING 9000 PLUS PEOPLE......BELIEVE ME WHEN I TELL YOU THEY WOULD ACCEPT DRUG MONEY TO KEEP THE BISHOPS BENTLEY RUNNING.....LOL

Unknown said...

I hear you Kris... but like I said, no "respectable" church would take it.... LOL