Thursday, October 26, 2006

Morning Edition - 10/26/06

REMINDER: Tomorrow night 5:30 p.m. - Until
Place: LQs; Between 47th and 48th Street and Lexington Avenue
Ladies: Free with flyer
Men: $5 with flyer
Cocktails: 2-for-1 until 7 p.m.
Complimentary buffet until 6:30 p.m.

Arrange to have the sitter keep the kids, let the significant other know you’re letting your hair down and join us at LQs (Latin Quarters) as we bid Evelyn Maldonado farewell and celebrate friendship. So whether you’ve known and loved Evelyn for years or can just use partying with a group of festive and laid-back folks, tomorrow is the night to get your let-loose on! R&B, Salsa, Pop, Reggaton, Reggae and Merengue abound – but you don’t have to be a Dancing With the Stars superstar to cut the rug. Celebrate success, live life and step out of the ordinary tomorrow night!!

New Jersey Shows Some Sense; Old School Sounds Crazy
In a vote of 4-3 the Supreme Court of New Jersey says that gay couples are entitled to the same rights as heterosexual couples. The justices gave lawmakers 180 days to rewrite the law. Now, the Garden State will decide if they will institute marriage or civil unions in the state. Presently, only Massachusetts allows gay marriage, while Connecticut and Vermont have civil unions for gay couples in place. Just as I was in the middle of reading the news reports and inwardly smiling to myself, I received a call from my mom – the first lady of a Pentecostal congregation and wife of my dad, a proud minister. I quickly mentioned the ruling and asked if she’d heard about it. Without missing a beat, she said, the issue will always be a hot-button one since gays are swimming upstream and trying to go against the norm. My joy fell to complete disappointment that a woman I admire so much and love wholeheartedly could be so ignorant on an issue. She had colorful analogies on how there are pros and cons to every situation – though she couldn’t really establish what the cons to gay marriage are. The conversation ended with a quiet moment, mainly because I was baffled at how ignorance and misinformation can prevail even in the most informed and open-minded folks. Comedian Wanda Sykes said it best, “Gay marriage is not a threat to conventional marriage; divorce is.” If you’re straight, I don’t see how the issue of gay marriage affects you. To the religious right: Rather than oppose gay marriage you might want to consider instituting laws that prevent straight folks who marry, from divorcing their partners. This will certainly protect that “sanctity” of marriage.

On Blast
I’m genuinely curious. I’ve been gay for as long as I can remember and openly gay for over 22 years. Why do you (as a straight person) feel that granting gay couples equal rights to heterosexual couples threatens your way of life? Why is there such an interest in what gay couples do in their intimate life? How would you feel (as a straight person) if we were discussing whether you and your loved one are entitled to the same rights as other couples?

Keep passin’ the open windows…

21 comments:

caspar608 said...

First, how many gay couples last?
Second, how many straight couples really uphold the sanctity of marriage?
Third, I don't believe anyone should marry unless they are serious about their spirituality and uphold the laws and commands of the original covenant. In other words, if the two of you aren't going to attend servicesa dn work together to uphod the laws of God to strenghten your family and be a light to others, then I would not suggest marriage. I don't care if you are gay or straight. If the only reason you want to get married is so that you can have the same "right" as married folks, stick to the domestic partnership agreement. Truth is, social security will be BANKRUPT in a few more years and you can be a beneficiary to anyone's pension plan. The whole gay marriage thing is a little bit overblown. Get married if you want to, I would attend the wedding and celebrate your love! But don't scream about wanting the same thing as something that has traditionally been between a man and a woman. That does not make any sense. Jesus loves us all and died on the cross for each and every one of us. I believe what infuriates God is when we do not recognize the sacrifice of his son and continue to do things that defy salvation. Fornicaton is fornication regardless of who you are fornicating with - its worng, but we do it anyway and ask God to forgive us. Perhaps their are gay couples who believe if they marry, they will no longer be fornicating and will be acceptable to God. I don't know. I just wouldn't bash anyone for wanted to be SPIRITUALLY connected to someone through marriage.

caspar608 said...

I wouldn't bash anyone at all. Live and let live.

Melissa said...

Threatened by gay marriage? While, there are a few things in this world that I feel threaten me; gay marriage isn't anywhere on that list. Besides, who am I to say who should get married period? I'm not one to throw out scriptures, but since this issue seems to strike such a religious cord in this country...try Matthew 7:1 on for size: "Judge not lest ye be judged."

One more thing to ponder. Getting the same rights as "traditional" couples will continue to be a strugge until politicians start looking at same-sex couples as people who can greatly contribute financially to a political party (which is probably already happening) or who can help increase the economic growth of a state or even possibly the country.

Anonymous said...

I'm more threatened by the straight marriage that is brought for citizenship than a gay marrage that is real. That affects all of our money. A gay married couple wants rights for their loved one to get what they've worked for. I mean love , love and love too. This all is relevant, but at the end of the day, the only ones who care are the ones who have nothing better than other peoples business to think about. One man said he didn't want his kids to think it was acceptable. There are many things that are unacceptable like being a hoe, drug wasted, baby makin, not working (oh we can go on). What can you do about them? I asked, Nothing, just mind your business and talk to your kids. If they're gay, you want them to be clean, happy, productive beings that know how to love themselves and others. Not some sorry soul who can't respect themselves or others (as many people are, gay or straight) AVP

Tammy said...

i dont give a shyt who is doing who. i got my own damn problems. relationships are screwy no matta who you screwing.

Anonymous said...

I'm more threatened by the beliefs of Christians and those that FEEL they are upholding God's law.
I ask these questions of you.

1). Wasn't it Chistians who began slavery?
2). Why you would as an Non-white person believe what Christian's have to say now?
3). How in the HECK does what you do behind your closed doors affect my life? I don't care if your doing back flips off the dresser, just repect people in puplic.
4). Isn't it our Chistian beliefs that are killing the only home (planet) that we have, what's next?
5). Isn't there the old Testament and New, did God change his mind....?
6). My belief,,,,, Be the best that YOU can and accept others for what they are. Respect all people and demand respect of yourself.

P.S. John Legend's CD has to get better than what I'm hearing now.

Cocoa Rican said...

I agree that it isn’t anyone’s business if two competent adults want to marry, but since the religious right has made such a HUGE deal of it and is now adding misinformation that has ignorant folks bring “gay bashings back,” I have to speak up. As I mentioned to my mother last night, I don’t ever want to marry – heck, the straight establishment was giving me a wonderful out without having to accept responsibility for it – but inequality is inequality. Admittedly, I’m worn-out on an issue I feel is insane to discuss. If someone is same gender loving and your are not – HOW THE F*CK DOES IT AFFECT YOU?????? That’s what I don’t understand. I have lesbian neighbors – a segment of the population I never really associated with in the past – and can now say, we’re the best of friends because I don’t try to understand your love for the kitty or the lack of magic-stick in lesbian interactions. It just doesn’t peak my interest nor does it affect me. More power to their ass. I’m now crossing the line between caring if straight people understand and a complete apathy for ignorant and intrusive behavior.

As for the John Legend new CD thingy – smoke two blunts, drink a forty and take down a Vicodin… that CD will be sounding like the brotha wrote it just for you – TRUST!

caspar608 said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
caspar608 said...

Actually the Egyptians were the first to enslave folks. Egyptians were Africans and worshipped many different gods and animals. actually. They enslaved the Jews, who enslaved other Jews and Jesus was Jewish and those who "believed" in Jesus were.....anybody? Thats right! CHRISTIANS. If you want to reference historical information please be factual as opposed to theoretical. EGYPTIANS WERE THE FIRST TO ENSLAVE FOLKS. EGYPTIANS WROTE THE MANUAL ON SLAVERY. A real Christian would not "enslave" anyone. Early Christians in the Bible had servants but were commanded to treat them with kindness.
Spirituality has everything to do with who we are and how we love. But please do not blame Christ for the destruction of the earth. If you are driving a car, heating your home with oil, smoking cigarettes or using any kind of chemicals I have news for you....YOU ARE DESTROYING THE EARTH.
Have a nice day.
And Cocoa, if you get married can I be the flower heffer?

caspar608 said...

I love your picture Cocoa!!!! You look absolutely adorable....and mischievous, which you are.....

Anonymous said...

Awww shucks, people should be allowed to love who they want. I am curiouse also, why, why is it anyone business what ANYONE does in their intimate life. DANG!!!


Redhotmamagirl

Cocoa Rican said...

Awww... Caspar... I'd go with adorable, although the wrinkles, dents, age blotches etc. would probably say otherwise... good thing is, since you'll be in my life forever I'm guaranteed the view through your eyes... :)

If I ever get married you can be the flower heffer AND the anesthesiologist. I have a strange feeling I'll need both!

BTW...call me... are we meeting here or at the club tomorrow night? I think the chances are you'll meet a man there and marry WAY before I do sunshine!

Tammy said...

caspar is right...the egyptians were the first slave owners. when y'all see the ten commandments on tv, even tho y'all looking at elizabeth taylor that was actually a black chile or was an egyptian.

Tammy said...

i meant that was a black chile "who" was an egyptian.

Jamal K. Franklin said...

I'm coming to NY...too bad I won't be there tomorrow night.

That Dude Right There said...

Can anybody answer this question? Were Adam and Eve Married? I don't read the bible, so I don't know.

The marriage that I would like to have is not based on religion or being blessed by God. I am blessed by God and that's enough for me. What I want is to be able to legally share my life, finances, children, and everything with my partner. Through, wills, powers-of-attorney and things of the sort, you can somewhat do that. But why should I only have partial rights that I have to jump through hoops and pay money to get? Straight people can get married and have rights by paying $15 dollars for a license and recited some words in front of a damn judge. Why can't I and my partner?

And people are so concerned with the spiritual side of marriage, why do the bother with the civil side of it? It's because they want the rights and privileges that some along with a civil marriage.

The people who don't want us to marry feel that way because they don't want to feel that we are equal to them. The same reason men didn't want women to vote and whites wanted to continue segregation.

caspar608 said...

Not all whites wanted segregation and not all black people eat chitterlings so pleae refrain from making statements about people in a broad fashion as if it were 100% true. The same can be said about all gay men acting in a feminine matter. I know gay dudes who would bust anyone's azz for assuming so.
Nor do I agree with black and white marriages as being the same as gay marriages. Its not, at all. Interracial couples back in the day who were prevented from marrying had more to do with racism and nothing at all to do with HOMOPHOBIA. And yes, I am a woman, but I also have the balls to say that I am not in favor of gay marriage simply because I believe marriage is for a man and a woman. That does not make me a homophobe or someone who hates gay people. I love my gay brothers and sisters as much as my straight brothers and sisters. I do believe the laws need to be rewritten to make more allowances for domestic partnerships for all couples gay straight etc perhaps, but definitely NOT marriages between man and man, woman and woman. Rights yes, marriage ABSOLUTELY PREPOSTEROUS. By demanding to be married you are only trying to reaffirm to yourself that you are "just like everyone else" or "just as good as married couples" - in fact, it is my belief that gay marriage is more of a trying to prove a point sort of deal than an actual desire to take vows and be recognized by God as a married couple. As far as getting married for $15 dollars is concerned, I personally would not marry in a court house - although you do have to marry in city hall before the whole church affair. You either marry me before God or we aren't getting married. People who get married in city hall are entitled to their $15 dollar marriage and I am sure that if they are Godly people they will have their marriage blessed.

And its fine for you to state your opinion about marriage and how people don't keep their vows and divorce rates and blah, blah , blah - divorce is high, families are falling apart, parents are forgetting they have children to set an example for, abortions are easier to get than having a tooth pulled and basically we are a mess. The bottom line is, the world would be much better and our relationships with God OVERALL would be much closer if we ALL were obedient, but while we are all down here living our lives liberally without any regard for what God would want us to do - what God commands us to do - then I guess we must all be ready for judgement when the day comes. I know I want to be ready, which is why I am telling you that God loves you and Jesus died for your sins - quite painfully and brutally might I add - and I would just like for you to keep that in mind everytime you having no regard for your actions or words or toss God aside for what you feel is what YOU want to do while you are on earth for this short time. Love deeply, forgive constantly, think in terms of eternity when you live your life.

Cocoa Rican said...

Wow... let me preface my statement with this...
Cas, I love you and you know my heart.

That said, you said a mouthful and unfortunately not all of what you said is true AND a lot of it comes from fear or imposing of OUR values and religion on others.

Rather than argue a point one way or the other, I found a very intelligent and clear piece... please read it carefully, think on it and let's not shoot any comments back and forth on it. It is meant to edify all of us. Before anyone goes there... my position is simple...I don't wish to ever get married but recognize that same gender loving individuals (gays & lesbians) are entitled to be married with all the rights and priveleges of their straight counterparts. Period. Discrimination is discrimination and whether it's sexual orientation, gender, age, race, etc., we have to fight to extinguish it. Sometimes, it's a bit more covert and may be harder to identify...but it doesn't mean it isn't there.

Whew...the article... http://www.bidstrup.com/marriage.htm

caspar608 said...

Thank you Cocoa for the well written article.
However, as my oldest and dearest friend you should also know that I am entitled to my own feelings and opinions. That does not make me a homphobic person, nor does it mean I fear or hate gay people. Quite the contrary, I support gay people. I would never allow anyone to bash you or any gay person I know without telling them to take a good long look at themselves. I am too large a person to stand on a soap box. My two feet are just fine. I am not one to care much about being politically correct either, I say exactly what is on my mind. In my comments I expressed truthfully how I feel and what I believe. You, me and every last person we both know is GUILTY of sin. If you don't believe in God, then it doesn't apply to you I suppose. And no sin is greater than the next...everyone will be judged in the end. Bottom line, I feel gay "marriage" is PREPOSTEROUS. Marriage, in the traditional sense of the word, is between a Man and a Woman. Period. If lawas were changed to give domestic partnerships the same rights as "marriage" then where is the argument. Where is the beef, where exactly is the hate? WHy fight for something that has TRADITIONALLY, since Biblical times, been between a Man and a Woman when you can have DOMESTIC PARTNERSHIPS created so that your partner can have the same rights as a spouse. Or could it be that gay folks have been so hurt at the way "society" views them, that thy want to force themselves into the "norm" by being "married". I don't have all of the answers, and I am not gay. I just think there has got to be a better way. ANd I can state my opinion, and say how I feel because I have faith and I try EVERYDAY to do what I feel God would like me to do. Which is why I felt COMPELLED to say how I feel and remind everyone who truly believes in God what he expects of US. Why does that make you upset/uncomfortable/ready to tell me to get off of a soapbox? I am no better than you, you are no better than me. I should not have had children out of wedlock. It was wrong. I asked God to forgive me and I refuse to have sex outside of marriage EVER AGAIN. There is a REASON why single mothers have such a difficult time. There is a REASON why so many children are fatherless in our country and why crime and poverty are so high. Its called CONSEQUENCE. I have taken responsibility for my actions and will do all I can to raise my children in a manner that teaches them to love and respect all. ANd if the day comes that one of my children believes he or she is gay, then I will embrace him or her and tell them no matter what they do there is a God who formed and fashioned them with his hands and they should conduct themselves in a manner that would please HIM. Not themselves, but HIM. So, you can protest outside of my house, you can call me a homophobe or a hate monger. If it makes you feel better. But the bottom line is, I am who I am, I believe what I believe and I have love for ALL. That is what my Lord and Savior COMMANDED me to do.
Come for me if you must.
And, by the way, the author of that article is a gay man so it really is a one sided argument. I am not trying to argue with anyone about what I believe and how I feel.

caspar608 said...

Just to reiterate, I do not believe GAY MARRIAGE is the answer to homophobia nor will it cure societies ills (foster children, abuse, etc). Domestic Partnerships with the same rights as Marriage would be a better solution. However, I resent the comparisons to interracial marriages etc. It is NOT the same. Love me or hate me. Take me or leave me.

Cocoa Rican said...

Cas, I didn't write the article, but when I came across the article I felt it best conveys the arguments and a very comprehensive rebuttal to many (if not all) of the arguments presented here. Equal, but separate and equal but different are still saying that a group of people are not entitled to the SAME rights. Let's pull away from the whole gay issue and use any other issue...when would you ever allow yourself, your children or those you love to be denied the SAME rights afforded their peers? Even if those rights were equal, the very notion that they weren't the SAME would have you in an uproar. Think of it in those terms. Proposterous, silly, whatever the description - what marriage for the gay population means is affording a group the SAME rights granted to their peers.