Recognize What Your “Perfect” Really Looks Like

As all the pieces in my puzzle settle into their rightful place, I’ve accepted that “perfect” or what we consider close to perfect, isn’t what we envisioned it to be. I’ve accepted a new job – one that offers me so many new possibilities – and I’m really excited about it; I have an incredible partner that is supportive, loving, faithful and caring; we have a happy and healthy child; we have the home, the car, the dog. In the eyes of many of my friends I lead the perfect life. Blessings abound and for all of them I am truly grateful. I’ve become increasingly aware that “perfect” is subjective – or better yet, “perfect” is not the rose-colored-painting that some would have us believe. Oh sure, I experience the everyday life disappointments and frustrations, but I’m referring to the reality that “perfect” sometimes means that we’ve learned to stop trying to live like the poster child for any group and we accept that which is OUR reality. Perfect is being in the now and enjoying my life – with all the flawed things that are a part of it. It is my acceptance that my home isn’t perfect, my man isn’t Superman and my child isn’t Elroy Jetson. I accept that relationships are a rollercoaster and that it has those slow climbs, those exhilarating drops and those check-the-safety belt moments. It’s silly to think that I’m going to live my life like a character out of Noah’s Arc or Queer As Folk. I’m not Noah, Brian or Michael. I’m Hector and he’s quite the character in his own right. When I look at my “perfect” life I see all the compromises, the stresses and the warm-and-fuzzy moments that make me appreciate who I am today. I take the time to take inventory of what’s wonderful in my life during moments of change and am honest where I can also stand to make some improvements. It turns out “perfect” is all about making your life what you want it to be today. It is too disappointing to think that I would sit around and worry about “perfect” and even more dreadful to believe that I live my entire life waiting for “perfect” when I had it all along.

Keep passin’ the open windows…