Monday, October 06, 2008

Back At One


Back At One
Relationships take work. Many times in life I’ve wondered if I have what it takes to make a relationship flourish and have it be everything that I want it to be. Sure there’s the romance, but there’s also the feeling of security that comes from a partner that understands your needs, recognizes your insecurities and accepts your many flaws. Warren Buffet – a billionaire revered for his wealth and wisdom – recently remarked that ‘the measure of success in life is the number of people you want to love you who do love you. And the way to be loved is to be lovable.’ We don’t always have the luxury of having those we love to truly love us in return. I’ve often commented to BD that we both suffered some pretty awful slights in life so that we would really appreciate each other today. Somehow I believe that if I met BD just five years ago, I wouldn’t have been ready to recognize the treasure that his love really is. As I read some of my favorite bloggers talk about their foray into dating and relationships I can’t help but think that their journeys have a purpose. Assuming they’re taking steps to be ‘lovable’ – not in some whimsical way – but truly lovable in the marketable way, then their struggle to love and be loved will be rewarded. Rather than setting materialistic standards and hurdles for our partners maybe we should be setting standards for who we want to be to someone. Are we ready to commit to a partner through the many episodes that our lives will have? Losing jobs, gaining weight, illness, even the natural aging process all present serious obstacles that can only be met and surpassed with the belief that you can always start ‘back at one.’ You know…that place where you first felt those butterflies in your stomach for your partner…when you left silly voicemail messages that contained a love song to punctuate your emotions…none of those emotions die of natural causes; we murder them with familiarity. As BD and I shared a romantic weekend together doing much of nothing, I looked into his face and saw the man I saw the very first time. The eyes that immediately caught my attention again held my gaze. His soft skin under my fingertips melted my heart like whipped cream over a hot cup of cocoa. I want to love him for life and that means that I need to consciously make an effort to start back at one.

On Blast
Forget your ‘baller’ salary and your tricked-out ride…think of yourself outside your designer threads and your $25 undies….fuck your power-pad and your color-coordinated appliances…what do YOU bring to the table to make you ‘lovable’?

Keep passin’ the open windows…

15 comments:

Darius T. Williams said...

Do you think this is really a question we can answer just off GP? Hmmm - I don't think I can.

Darius T. Williams said...

btw - I don't have $25 undies! I get the four in a pack from Wal-Mart for 11.88!

fuzzy said...

Hunny, I have $30 undies!!!

I would say that most people say that I am funny. They say it's a quality they're attracted to. They say I'm sincere and real. Fun-loving and exciting. I can only say what I've been told. What I believe I bring to the table may not be what people see when I sit at the table.

Nobody not really... said...

Someone very special to me recently told me: "I always think of you when I'm down. I know you'll make me feel better."

I'd heard similar before.

I guess my quality is being there.

Darius T. Williams said...

Hey - I just added a new post.

www.bloggersread.blogspot.com

~Kahlua~ said...

According to my husband (because I flat-out asked him the On-Blast question) he states that I am the "Hull" of his universe. I keep him grounded in life with my love, security, nurturing, patience and personal customer service representative skills (He HATES automated phone systems and is NOT good at dealing with people with regard to resolving issues with bills/services. He knows that no matter what time of day, or night, if he needs me, I'll be there without question. He loves that I keep track of the little details of his life (undie and shoe sizes or what his mama used for soothing him when he was a kid) and he can always count on knowing how to feed his body, mind and soul with my cooking. Guess I'm not doing too bad huh? ;)

deonte' k said...

Great blog man. I truly felt where you were coming from.

bLaQ~n~MiLD said...

Brutally honest although that seems to work better for friendships. Relationships eh I've run into a lot of trouble with that. Hence...

~Damnit!

Curio said...

I am generous to a fault.

Caspar608 said...

Take me as I am or have nothing at all...that is what makes me "loveable".

: )

j_shanlin said...

Have I told you lately that I love you!? This would be the first post that I read after my return to "Blogtopia", and I loved it. Me and Marcus are back together now... well we actually have been for sometime now, but you talk about starting back at one? We have been making love like tomorrow theyll pass a law saying that it's not allowed lol. But no seriously, that "1" feeling is just so delightful when you're with someone you love. And what makes it better is, we're best friends.

Mr. Jones said...

$30 undies?!?! Come on now. Even I won't do that.

As for what makes me lovable, it's my charm and wit. I can either use it for good or evil. You already know. LOL.

One Man’s Opinion said...

11.88? Damn, D, that's too much. That's why I don't wear underwear, except at work.

Hmmmm, what do I bring to the table? I'm assuming you mean besides my extra large penis and firm, mellon like ass....Let's see, what do I bring to the table. Honesty. All my love and heart. And Someone to listen to.

Tiffanie said...

I've been told that I'm very nurturing and I make boys feel comfortable and relaxed. I say, it's because I was married for so long that it transcends into my new single life. It's a sweet curse, I suppose. With reference to my girlfriends, they say I'm sweet and fair. It's a Libra thang.

That Dude Right There said...

Hell, I don't know. But people just seem to love me.