Monday, December 06, 2010

Your Dreams vs. What Your Parents Dream For You

It just so happens that life isn’t always what we wish for and certainly not what others wish for us. Now that I’m a parent, I’m coming to terms that what we wish for our children isn’t always what they want for themselves. Accepting that our children will choose a life all their own – along with goals, dreams and beliefs – that we may not subscribe to or even agree with is truly a revelation. After spending close to two weeks with my parents in Puerto Rico, I believe they are coming to terms with the fact that I am a gay man and that their idea of what my family would look like is not so, but it doesn’t mean that they can’t make the intelligent decision to share in my life and MY dreams by simply accepting that their dream for my life WAS theirs and not mine AND that the most important things a parent could want for their children are health, happiness and fulfillment. As I look at our son I wish so many amazing things for his life, but having my interaction with my parents as a reference, I accept that he may choose a completely different life than what his dad and I have envisioned for him.

Pursuing your dreams is as important to your survival as the air you breathe and the water you drink. Sure, you can forgo your dreams, but the consequence of doing so may be the emotional, mental and spiritual equivalent of going without air or water. Your spirit would die.

Give some thought to your dreams and forget about what everyone else has dreamed for you. This life is too short and too precious to live for someone else. I’ve found that the remarkable thing about the human spirit is that it is resilient. Your parents, siblings and friends will eventually accept that who you are and who you wish to be is so much more precious when it is genuine and filled with vibrant life; the kind of life that someone lives when they are their authentic self.

Keep passin’ the open windows…

No comments: