I Love New York; Noah’s Arc Season 3?
Last night VH1’s I Love New York, a spin-off of the train wreck that is Flava of Love, debuted. New York, the brashest, most ghetto reality TV contestant to grace Flava’s glorified project, was treated to two seasons of Flava and her disconnect from her own reality earned her a show of her own. Why? That is a question I repeatedly asked myself as I marveled at how I spent more time giving commentary to friends on the phone than watching the show. First, the star of the show, Tiffany Patterson aka New York, is the premiere ghetto princess. She is the projects meets Lottery winner squared. To heighten your low-life quotient, producers chose to add Sister Patterson, New York’s mom, to add a second opinion to the already brain numbing foolishness. As if having two glorified project hoochies doesn’t do enough to grate your nerves until sparks fly out of your knuckles, the requisite flaming court jester had to be added – enter Chamo, New York’s personal assistant. Chamo (real name Mauricio Sanchez) gives every gay man in America cause to pause. His dress, demeanor and laughability factor made me add half-half to my coffee this morning instead of no-fat soy milk. Please let my heart stop beating so fast LAWD!!! Deep breath… Now to the real deal of the show… long story short, 90% of the men cast to be on this reality fiasco are gay. Forget what you heard or how Sister Patterson picked out one or two of these pranksters out herself… take it from a gay man… 90% of these men are gay. The remaining 10% of the men are disgusting, boring or such a bad fit to be with this future baby-momma-drama queen that it doesn’t even make sense to televise this – well, unless you’re going to use the video as evidence at child-support hearings to show the men were intoxicated and coerced to bed this witch. So, I was disgusted… all the way to the last second of the 60-minute disaster. What struck me as funny was that it would have been a better show if we replaced New York with Noah (Darryl Stephens) and just made the show into Noah’s Arc, season 3. Go figure…
Ladies: If a man is FINE (PHINE!!) and is willing to spend his life with you – giving of himself emotionally and physically – do you care if he is/was gay?
Gay Men: If a man is obviously gay, but refuses to accept this and lives his life closeted, can you carry on a relationship with him – even if it means that you will remain in the shadows?
Str8 Men: If you get wind that your boi (your male friend) who you thought was a player is really a closet homosexual, would you confront him and discuss it or ignore the whole issue and act as though you haven’t a clue?
Keep passin’ the open windows…