Living In RedAs my close friends will attest, I have been procrastinating on getting my place together since my move last June. Basically, I like to have things the way I want them before I get excited about my place. I absolutely love the space, but I wanted the right furniture. First, I started with my bedroom furniture. I got a new bedroom set sometime last summer and decided the living room was next. Yesterday, resident blogger Caspar – my oldest and dearest friend – took the trip over to one of our area furniture stores for me to take a peek at the living room packages I had ogled at online. Since I viewed the sets online and thought about them at length, the process was simple. We walked in, rearranged the store – I mean literally folks. Cas and I moved cocktail tables and end tables to be sure we liked them with my chosen living room package. Folks began looking at us like we were being nuts, but it was absolutely the right thing to do. Thanks Cas for helping choose the new living room digs. Now for the paint job…I’ll be recruiting some help to get my walls in order. I want color!
Progress; Finding the Fun In Fitness
I’ve been working out harder and really enjoying it. Yesterday evening I broke my record of 4.5 miles in 35 minutes by running 6 miles in 45 minutes. I’m also showing results in my weight loss plan. Since the start of the year I’ve lost 7 pounds bringing my current weight to 156 lbs. This means I only have 6 lbs left to lose before reaching my 150 lb goal. I’ve turned working out into a project that is fun and challenging. I’m now looking forward to pushing harder and breaking all my previous goals…not to worry, 150 lbs is as small as I’d like to get. I’ll have to adjust my caloric intake as I increase my cardio workouts.
On Blast
I was speaking to Baby J yesterday, of The T on Today’s News blogger fame, and he mentioned that men are visual animals and I mentioned that as gay men we are much harder on ourselves than our straight brothers. We appear to care about our physical appearance well into our 40s and 50s.
Do you agree that straight men have less pressure to stay fit than gay men? Do you believe that this lack of focus on physique has anything to do with straight women’s acceptance of straight men as they are…or as they become?
Keep passin’ the open windows…
11 comments:
Interesting perception - but I'm not sure. I think it's a "sexual-preference-less" issue. I say this because there could be men who are gay who care and those who don't care about their appearance. As well, I know straight dudes that LIVE in the gym - then I know some that could care less. For those who stay in the gym and are concerned about physical appearance...could their motives be to please their female counterparts? Maybe. But then, I'm sure I could see some people saying nah simply because they do what they do for them. So, um...who knows - but if a survey was done I'd be interested in seeing the results.
When we got off the phone, I thought about this some more in depth... I think it's true that we as gay men and more specifically gay men of color are visual which sometimes leads us to take extreme measures in making our bodies.. I mean, when is the last time you saw a gay man that looked like Peter Griffin or Doug Heffernen that was happy?? idk...
It was really great speaking to you this weekend pa... you made me smile real big...so sweet and so genuine...love it. Can't wait until we all meet in person.
I don't think straight men have it any easier, really. I mean....women are fickle, too.
We're so vain! Plain and simple
I believe that since gay men are often single and unattached well into their 40s and 50s many feel the need to maintain that physical stature. They are still trying to attract a mate. Straight men are usually married by this time are seemingly have no need to maintain.
I never mentioned progressive...I don't have hair - much less permed hair and have a body that only I can criticize...that said, you're right..there are gay men (like yourself) who make it apparent that they don't give a fuck about their appearance...that said, I guess being a self-hating, homophobe does lend itself to allow for a more lax disposition with regard to what you would call our "temple." Yeah...Cap, what does the Bible say about you just letting your temple turn to shit?
I cant wait to come on over and sit my ass down on your brand new couch with a cup of coffee in my hand : )
If I win the lottery this week I will buy those expensive ass tables for you.
I think we should do a latte or cappucino color for the LR. Something soothing and neutral.
Cocoa
Please do not waste the energy on responding to ANYONE who thinks Benny Hinn is an annointed televangelist. PLEASE.
Love, Cas
Dear Mr. Cocoa Rican,
I mean no offense, but with all due respect, I have an answer to your question.
I feel everyone should take care of the "temple" God has given us. I think all people should work to look their best. Unfortunately, perfection doesn't exist in the physical realm, which you are already disqualified- We ALL are disqualified. When did taking care of yourself become a competition?
My comment was more focused on how our "temple" is presented, which has an equal significance in correlation to the foundation of our "temple". Sadly, gay men fail at this task because they build their house after the pattern of a female "temple" instead of their rightful created order.
Therefore, in answering your question, it shouldn't be about the "look". Check the foundation first! That is the starting point in figuring out why you have to work twice as hard to be 50% equally comparable to straight men and minimally validated to what you were created to be.
P.S. I guess you don't realize that being a gay man, you automatically take the place of a "woman" to gain the attention of the "visual animal" you seek. Could I conclude your issue is not with straight men, but with other women and their natural ability to do what you have to work exhaustively to do?
I can go much further in this analysis, but I'll stop here for now.
i work with a bunch of straight white guys and they all look 10-15 years older than me, even though i'm older than roughly half of them. but i do believe that vanity is quite the motivating factor.
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