Friday, February 19, 2010

The Exit for Humiliation is Marked, “Divulge for Dignity”

I will be the first to tell you that your life is NOT everyone’s business. You do not need to explain your motives, decisions or reasoning to anyone – well, unless you understand that your silence will leave room for speculation and uninformed conclusions. Case in point, Tiger Woods chose the high road. Caught red handed, the parade of women he cheated with lined-up to tell their version of what happened and painted him as the cheating, low-down husband who betrayed his family. Although this may very well be true, had Tiger chosen to come out at the onset of the scandal – ala Kobe Bryant –appeared contrite and apologized to HIS FAMILY for his betrayal, the parade of women would have had the wind knocked out of their gossip sails; America would have simply looked at those women and their stories as jilted ‘home wreckers’ unworthy of our attention. Today Tiger faces the media – still with his posturing and rules in place – and he will try to explain what has been discussed for months.

LESSON 1: CONTROL YOUR OWN STORY; OWN UP TO IT; BEAT YOUR ACCUSERS TO THE PUNCH

LESSON 2:
DO NOT ATTEMPT TO SAVE FACE; APOLOGIZE FROM THE HEART

LESSON 3:
GROW FROM YOUR MISTAKE; DON’T REPEAT IT AGAIN

It’s seems difficult and complicated at the onset, but addressing issues head-on is always the best solution. After the initial explosion of emotions, today’s disaster quickly becomes yesterday’s news.

To recap…follow these simple steps:
1. Admit to the incident (especially when there is proof of the same) and provide a few short sentences about why you believe it happened. Do not provide sordid details – including names, why it felt good at the time, etc. This only creates further insecurity for parties who want to repair relationships.
2. Apologize to the loved ones your hurt. Do not attempt to save face during your apology since this will be the ONE time that you will put forth that you are SORRY for hurting the ones you love.
3. Explain what you look forward to – this includes, not repeating the same mistake, rebuilding your relationship OR attempting to forge a friendship with the hurt party.


Keep passin’ the open windows…

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

I have an even better idea.
How about not violating the trust of your family or the public.
How about being a decent human being.
How about controlling your urges.

Then all of the other shenanigans can be avoided.