Wednesday, December 27, 2006

Morning Edition - 12/27/06


IF I COULD...

The Problem With Adulthood
As a child my mother forced my siblings and I to get along. We weren’t allowed to physically fight, we were admonished to share everything and we were never allowed to go to bed angry with each other. In hindsight it was a noble idea and one that stayed with me. Although my being gay has always been the wedge to drive me away from my family, I’ve always made an extra effort to be there for them and am fiercely protective of all my siblings. Recently, my family suffered an enormous blow and I resorted to what I know best – protect, defend and make things better. What I have quickly realized is that, as adults, I can’t help anyone (even my siblings) when they don’t want my help and worse even, don’t wish to help themselves. Although the events that transpired did not involve me directly, the very fact that they involve my siblings made me a complete wreck. Then that pivotal moment occurred. …an epiphany of sorts. I realized it is not my place to do anything, but mind my business. I guess my pain is transformed to anger – it’s all I know. Oddly, I look back to when I was 15 and was forced into the harsh streets of NYC. Rejected by my family and scared, I could do nothing but hide my fear and pain. The luxury of showing weakness was not mine to enjoy and because of this, I can’t really show vulnerability today. Strangely, rather than my family members seeing my anger and frustration toward their perpetrators as justified, I’m seen as the unrelenting bully. So, I give up. I will step back and step away to let my family find their way. In the words of Donnie McClurkin, I stand. I love my family and hope the best for them, but it is apparent that I must take my own advice. Sometimes, you have to love folks enough to let them go.

Life Subscription Not Renewed
James Brown and President Gerald Ford both died this week, Monday and Tuesday respectively, making the final days of 2006 reflective ones. Brown, a pioneering artist, hailed as the creator as such genres of music as hip-hop and funk and Ford who assumed the presidency after the infamous Nixon Watergate impeachment, both are said to have recently suffered from pneumonia – although the exact cause of death of Ford has not been announced. Brown was 73 at the time of death and Ford 93. Brown will be viewed at the Apollo theater in NYC beginning Thursday afternoon, while Ford’s arrangements have not been announced.

Serial Rapist of Men
In the small town of Baytown, Texas there’s a bit of an unusual crime spree taking place. Allegedly, a black man, 18-21 years of age and almost six feet tall is raping other men. To date five men have come forward to report they have either been raped or attacked with the intent of being raped. Authorities say that men are less likely to report a rape since the victims may feel it is a crime that shows them as weak and threatens their masculinity. Statistics show that 1-in-33 men are either raped or attempted to be raped, while women have a much higher rate of 1-in-6. Sketches of the assailant are now posted around town and the town folk are ever vigilant.

On Blast
We all have shells – personality traits that cover your true self. Some shells are thinner than others, but in the end, we all have them. For some, it’s an abrasive personality that masks a tender vulnerability, while others appear to be conservative, but are hidden freaks. What hidden personality trait would those close to you be surprised to discover?

Keep passin’ the open windows…

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

so what, now you're moving to Texas...

Anonymous said...

I feel ya on the family thing:

If you need somebody, call my name
If you want someone, you can do the same
If you want to keep something precious
You got to lock it up and throw away the key
If you want to hold onto your possession
Don't even think about me

If you love somebody, set them free

If it's a mirror you want, just look into my eyes
Or a whipping boy, someone to despise
Or a prisoner in the dark
Tied up in chains you just can't see
Or a beast in a gilded cage
That's all some people ever want to be

If you love somebody, set them free

You can't control an independent heart
Can't tear the one you love apart
Forever conditioned to believe that we can't live
We can't live here and be happy with less
So many riches, so many souls
Everything we see we want to possess

If you need somebody, call my name
If you want someone, you can do the same
If you want to keep something precious
You got to lock it up and throw away the key
If you want to hold onto your possession
Don't even think about me

If you love somebody, set them free

On blast: People think I am mean when all I am doing is protecting myself by keeping people at a distance so that I don't get hurt.

Redhotmamagirl

Anonymous said...

...I can't believe I just admitted to that...

Redhotmamagirl

Cocoa Rican said...

Well, since I'm direct, assertive and fearless, some folks seem to think that I don't have feelings and am (as my baby sister put it) heartless. Hmmm... I wonder if that's a shell after all... anyway, I do get hurt, I do get offended and contrary to popular belief, those wet streaks running down my face that happen every decade-or-so in my sleep are not allergies... LOL

Anonymous said...

I may be with u on that one a lot of times people confuse my bluntness for heartless... but i do, i do, i do have a heart.

lj said...

I love that song.