Saturday, August 09, 2008
Evening Edition - 8/9/08
What We See
I remember the very first time I laid eyes on BD. It was like my heart knew that this was the guy; the one I wanted to spend time with and share my life with. Today as I relaxed, I thought about what we see. Before moving back to NYC in 2003, a Maryland preacher left me with some words of wisdom – a catchy phrase really – that today, I apply to all areas of my life. She said, “If what you see is not what you saw, then what you see is temporary.” ‘Now what the fuck does that mean – exactly?!’ I pondered that line for years to come and reasoned its meaning to be so many different things. My boi Boot in Maryland remembers it clearly because he’s my man-of-the-cloth, if you will, and we’d always say the line and come up with explanations for what the sister meant that morning. Today I look back at that first time that I saw BD…what I saw…what I see today. Is what I saw temporary or is what I see temporary? I know now that to answer that question it is best to look at someone’s history. We all have loved ones who talk a good game and have many goals and promises with their lives – and conversely – ours. The easiest way to know what to believe is to look at what the person has proven time and again. If what you see is not what you saw, then what you see is temporary. Today it means, I may have seen a beautiful, intelligent, loving man who I wanted to spend my whole life with, but if his actions didn’t prove him capable of filling those shoes, then what I see is temporary. What we see is sometimes just what we want to see. What we feel is sometimes just want we want to feel. There’s nothing wrong with wanting more and feeling more, but there comes a time when our wishes must be met with rewards. The greatest reward being that we are living our best life with someone who fits the bill and walks-hand-in-hand in our vision.
How has what you see affected who you’ve shared your life with?
Keep passin’ the open windows…