La Isla Bonita and Temper-Temper
Well folks I’m back from seven days on my home turf of Puerto Rico. Unlike most of my other trips, this one had little to do with pleasure and more to do with taking care of my dad post surgery. I’m happy to report that the surgery was a success and he’s recovering well. In the same vein, I’m recovering well too – since I worked like a country mule. Sitting in my office today is my true vacation and my appreciation for not working in a capacity that requires me to perform manual labor daily. I love my parents and would truly do it again – a million times over – but I’m afraid for them. After working seven days straight – everything from cleaning, painting, gardening, cooking and caring for their dog and cat – I realized that I (not yet 40-years old) was exhausted. I couldn’t imagine retirees doing this. Having a home at their age is physically taxing and I suspect it’s a responsibility they won’t be able to maintain for long. I pray the Lord I’m wrong. All this said, I was the parent and as such I was attacked by mom and dad at every turn. The role reversal of saying we were not going out on a given day was odd at best and disconcerting at worst. As has become the norm, BD was my constant anchor in the storm. I can’t thank him enough for being my back bone. I suffered terrible separation anxiety since I haven’t been away from him for any real time for over a year. Let’s keep it real, this man is my 24-7 tireless ying to my yang. One thing is certain; my temper is not what it once was. Maybe it was the added stress of running a house, having two geriden (geriatric children) and stressing about the well being of my dad, but my fuse was virtually nonexistent. I was blunt, coarse and at times terrifying in my delivery. I finally took a deep breath a few days before returning to NYC and said, “Cocoa you’re scaring folks so stop it.” I may have to return at the beginning of the year to check on the folks again. BD made my return to NYC extra special. He surprised me with Chinese food, while I showered and we made love until every last knot of stress was worked away. His thoughtful card, intuitive kindness and calm make me the person I want to be. Thank you happy boi! I now miss mom and dad, but with my sister at the helm for the next week, I’m sure they’ll be okay. To all who prayed for my family a HUGE thank-you!
My parents have officially reached the stage where I am anxious about their well being while they live alone. What would you do to minimize the pressure of elderly family members when they live so far away?
Keep passin’ the open windows…