Yesterday is not tomorrow, but it’s good to remember the lessons we’ve learned to repeat those things that worked and stifle those that didn’t; All to say that my building management company accepted my offer to move in August ’09. Now comes the part where we hammer-out the details of our move, living arrangements and plethora of compromises for our new crib. That’s right folks, you’ve got to accept that unless you live alone, there will be compromises. Here are a few rules that are non-negotiable items for me….
- Rent/Mortgage: Must be paid on time BEFORE any other bill is satisfied
- Mutual Respect: Personal artifacts – journals, cell phones, mail – must be respected at all times. No snooping. If questions arise you should ask your partner to clarify issues for you
- Cleanliness: We all have different levels of tidiness in our daily life; Regardless what your comfort level is, bathroom(s) and kitchen must always be kept neat and clean. No dirty dishes should be left overnight; toilet(s) should not be dirty; sinks should be clean; and tub should be clean enough to take a soaking-hot bath in
- Clutter: You are entitled to keep any/all things that are important to you, so long as those items are not cluttering or otherwise strewn throughout common areas. Your personal valuables – including keepsakes – should be stored properly
- Guests: Guests should be cleared with the family prior to their visit. Exes or interested parties are NEVER guests and it is NEVER okay for them to visit. Overnight guests should be cleared with the family with an acceptable/appropriate timeframe for their visit announced in advance of their stay
- Nights Outside the Home: Outside of professional/business engagements, neither partner should ever sleep outside the home
- Open communication: All issues are open for discussion and you are encouraged to discuss any/all issues to foster a positive living arrangement at all times
Now many of you may look at the above list and find it odd that I would mention these things in advance, but they are important. Anyone who tells you that these are things that don't need to be shared, is diluting themselves into an impending disaster. The more your partner knows about what is acceptable the better you both can work toward making each other happy and cohabitating successfully.
What are some of your non-negotiable living arrangements when sharing space with a partner?
Keep passin’ the open windows…