While I can track my weight struggles back to my teens, I’ve chosen to let go of a lot of my harsh self-judgments and work strictly by the numbers. After more than SEVEN months of chillin’ out and ignoring my gym membership, I mustered the courage to return in time to – I HOPE – be presentable for my beach-birthday-getaway in August. I’m now officially more than 25 lbs. heavier than I was last summer. Amazing, but expected, since I stopped smoking and took on eating as a hobby. The truth is, I’ve never really been this heavy and was almost amused by how different my body felt and appeared. It wasn’t until I couldn’t fit my clothes that I became alarmed. My dimensions changed stretching my enviable 29” waist to a bulging 34”, while my behind and thighs now threaten to tear my underwear to shreds. The one plus out of the whole deal is that my face somehow filled-in and wrinkles were pushed out from around my cheek area. Someone once said that you reach an age when you have to choose between your face or your body. If you gain weight your face will look younger, but if you keep a fit body, then your face will betray your youthful efforts. I accept that I’ll need to sacrifice the face because being this large is simply uncomfortable. I lumbered on to the scales at the gym on Saturday to give myself a starting weight – and contrary to what anyone thinks, I’m not ashamed to share it here – 179 lbs! At 5’7”, I’m thick and happy. Many friends and family have surmised that I’m somehow healthier than I was when I was thinner, but I’m not. I guess sometimes folks see fuller as healthier. My man also makes me feel great at any size and that has helped me be more comfortable in my own skin as the numbers climbed. Sunday I returned to the gym and knocked-out 60 minutes of cardio before getting re-acquainted with my toning exercises. It will be a while before my stamina, strength and flexibility return, but I’m glad to be back. As the weeks go by I will provide updates on the changes – including those I’ve taken with regard to my food intake. The present goal may be a 40th beach-birthday weekend, but the true long-term plan is to be healthier in general.
The numbers don’t judge…they just state what is. Reveal your current height, weight and waist size.
Keep passin’ the open windows…