Friday, September 28, 2007

Morning Edition - 9/28/07

Jumping the Broom vs. Jumping the Gun
Yesterday, while frantically trying to get my work done before the close of business – they’ve been working me like a Hebrew slave – I received an odd e-mail from BD. The subject line read, “Which do you like best?” I opened the message and was faced with eight of the most beautiful Tiffany wedding bands. Now, the brand of the bands or the resplendent beauty of this exquisite jewelry would have bowled anyone over, but as the undying romantic, the greater message is what shot out at me. Is he asking me to marry him? Admittedly, our relationship has grown in leaps and bounds, but marriage? Then there’s that little voice in the back of my mind calling me a hypocrite for all the times that I said, “I agree that gay folks should have the right to marry, but I know the institution is not for me.” Now I sat staring at the screen with the biggest smile, thinking how even suggesting the commitment meant so much to me. He wasn’t asking me to be his boyfriend or his lover, he was asking me to be his life-partner and husband. For the record – and before the ignorant start drawing conclusions – we’d both be the husband and groom in any proposed marriage. Rather than choosing my favorite ring, I simply replied with, “Are you asking me something sir?” Two minutes later my office phone rang and I picked up the receiver to hear the heartiest laugh. “Yes, I’m asking you two things. First, I’m saying that I acknowledge that we’re growing toward becoming one and I find myself thinking about spending the rest of my life with you – so, soon I will be asking you to marry me. Gotta problem with that? Second, which band do you think would be best?” I said, “Baby, they’re all beautiful and I love 1, 3 and 4, but I’m completely overwhelmed that you’re thinking this way. Now you know you’re going to have to ask me properly right?” He continued laughing before saying, “You know I wouldn’t do it any other way.” So we went on to debate what bands we both liked and why the ones we chose made perfect sense. We even discussed my dream of us marrying in a beautiful, simple and intimate wedding on the beach in Puerto Rico. As we hung up I took a deep breath and put my head down a moment. I looked up and said, “Thank you for knowing what is best for me before I even know it.” I then shut off my PC, called BD and we rushed to ride home together discussing his printed version of the bands on the train. As I stood up to get off the train at my stop, he winked and said, “I love you.” I looked back and said, “I love you more,” before walking on to the platform. Hey, some may think we’re jumping the gun, but to us we’re already feeling like we need to jump the broom.

Party Over Here!
Summer 2007 was one to go down in history as one of my more fun and positive summers ever. Now it’s time to close the summer out and look forward to fall and winter with some HOT fun. On Friday, October 19th, we’ll be trotting over to LQs – between 47th and 48th and Lexington Avenue (NYC) – for our end of summer reconnect! So join us right after work (5:30 p.m.) for a night of rekindling our friendship fires, dancing and good cheer.

Where: LQ
Address: Lexington Ave; Between 47th and 48th Street
Time: 5:30 p.m. – Until we find you puking in your girlfriend’s purse
Attire: Business Casual – no sneakers, no work boots
Lowdown: R&B, Hip-Hop, Salsa and Oldies; Must be at least 21; 2-for-1 drinks before 7 p.m.; Free buffet 5:30-6:30 p.m.

Physique Mystique
The hamster-wheel that is the gym doesn’t stop turning regardless of the seasons, the dating situation or whether or not I feel my body is in pretty good shape. A friend of mine recently mentioned, “You’re really committed to hitting that gym, huh?” I could only think of that Destiny’s Child favorite of mine, Cater 2 U. The song has a line that says, “I promise you…I’ll keep myself up…” I’ve discovered that I’m a “happy-eater.” That is, I actually eat more when I’m happy than when I’m cruising along; Which would explain why I’ve always been at my heaviest when I’ve been in relationships. Of late, my workouts have been very hard – everything from three-mile runs to hip-hop class and even boot camp classes that take me to the verge of up-chucking. All said my dimensions remain the same, but my weight has progressively increased. I’m now tipping the scale at the 160 lbs. range. You can’t really cheat physics. If you eat more and workout harder, you can count on bulking up, rather than just carving your physique. There aren’t any complaints on any fronts – mine or BD’s - but you know that inner voice reminds me that I need to check my happy-eating-ass. My official post-summer weigh-in and measurements will be taken Monday.

On Blast
We all have body-part preferences we immediately gravitate to when we look at others. Fill in the blank….
I thought this guy/girl I dated had an amazing _______________________ but it turned out it wasn’t great at all.

Keep passin’ the open windows…


Anonymous said...

When you and BD tie the knot i want and invite to this wonderful union. YOU AND BD MAKE ME SAY TO MYSELF " YES LORD, LOVE BETWEEN TO SMART MEN CAN BE REAL"



Adam said...

There's no such thing as jumpin' the gun, when you feel it in your heart. I hate it when people try to judge other people's relationships and say that they're going too fast. It makes the rest of us start to question what's in our hearts.

You better marry that man SOON, or I'll WALK up there and kick your a** with your own foot. ;-) Lord knows you've been pushing love away too many years. Ain't your arms tired yet!?!

I'm so happy for you and your real life romance novel. You better live it! Choose number 3 AND 4!!! You can always use a backup. LOL

I thought this guy I dated had an amazing set of legs, but evidently, I was misguded.

Darius T. Williams said...

I thought this guy/girl I dated had amazing dental hygiene but it turned out it wasn’t great at all.

Joey Bahamas said...

I thought this guy/girl had a cute body, but it turned out not to be great at all...

Happy happy, joy joy...a wedding. To be honest I've always preferred funerals because if we're going to make such a big deal out of something it should stay that way...death is final, marriages are not in many cases. Jump the gun if you feel it's right...our responsibility is to insure our own happiness without oppressing others in the process...dddddddddoooooooooo iiiiiiiiittttttttttttttt!!!!!!...if it's right

Anonymous said...

I've been following/lurking on your blog for quite some time.

I must say that am elated that you and BD have decided to eventually embark on a journey together. May that journey bring your closer - in mind, body & spirit.

There's a popular quote that says 'For those who know me, no explanation is necessary, for those who don't no explanation is possible.' I feel that fits your situation perfectly.

Good Luck & Godspeed....


Kensilo said...

Someone's gettting MARRIED, Someone's getting MAARRIED!! When it comes to love there is never a too soon or late time to be committed to one another. Love has no timeline so enjoy each other and be good to one another.
Someone's getting MARRIED!
(Cheezy i know)

Dayne Avery said...

OMG!!! Can I come? I've never been to a male wedding.

BD seems so romantic. That's what I'm talking about. It shows that romance is alive and well.

Jeanine said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Jeanine said...

Oh Papi to say that I am happy for you is an understatement! I wish you and BD all the happiness and love in the world.

PS...In the event that a flowergirl is needed, I will happily volunteer Princess P :-)

Luv ya hon!

Cocoa Rican said...

Thnx Eric. know you're right! I have to see you soon! is right as rain.
Al...thnx for "lurking" you know you can always come all out in the open with me! LOL're not even as silly as I was when I saw the suggested rings!
Dayne...BD is one of the most romantic men I've ever would be nice to have you see me spastic on that day!
Jeanine!! Baby it's been a minute! Flower girl?! Sounds like a great idea...if I ever get my ideas together!

That Dude Right There said...

This post took my breath away and damn near brought tears to my eyes. You and BD give all the rest of us hope.

Now can I sing Luther's "Here and Now" at the ceremony?

life said...

You're not being a hypocritic, your growing.

Mr. Jones said...

I thought this guy/girl I dated had amazing personality, but turns out he was an asshole.

"You and BD give all the rest of us hope."

They sure do. Congrats man.

Anonymous said...

why didn't you tell me this on the phone Friday?

I met him in person folks. He's wonderful : )

Cocoa you are perfection. Stop being so darn hard on yourself.


yet another black guy said...

if i didn't love your ass so much i'd be jealous, CONGRATS MAN!!!!!!!!!!

Coy said...

*smiles Broadly*
Yes! Many Congratulations Cocoa.
I'm very happy for you and BD and
lil mini me. Stay blessed.