Friday, July 14, 2006

Morning Edition - 7/14/06

The 420
I knew there would come a time when I would lose track of the vernacular and need some schooling on what the youth of today use to speak of those things they don’t want us “grown folks” to know about. A couple of months back while speaking to a youngin’ I met at a club, he mentioned whether or not I got down with the 420. I’ll admit that I thought about jeans and when I mentioned “I’m not big into the latest fashions,” the brotha simply laughed and said, “I’m talkin’ about blazin’ trees.” As it turns out the 420 simply means smoking marijuana. Lesson learned… tree burned. Unfortunately, the old man in me refused to just let the 420 go as the “new” terminology for smoking weed. I jumped on the web and researched the origins of this odd number. Various myths circulated about how the 420 got started. One belief was that the number took form in police codes for marijuana or that it was simply the number of active chemicals in marijuana. Both of these myths are false. For the record, there are only 315 active chemicals in weed. At any rate, the 420 actually got started way before I could even operate a lighter – 1971 – at San Rafael High School. A group of students that called themselves the Waldos would smoke weed each day at – you guessed it – 4:20. Later, the time and the number caught on and the kids were able to speak openly about marijuana in front of their parents and the adults wouldn’t have a clue as to what the heck they were referring to. Like all “cool” terminology, the term spread and today, youngins use it as though they just came up with it.

Stocky or Fat
A while back the Morning Edition featured a quick blurb about studies showing gay men were more likely to suffer from eating disorders because of the perceived physical demands for youthful bodies in the gay lifestyle. Unfortunately, no one relayed the story to the men I’ve met over the last couple of weeks. One, a blind date we’ll call “Ryan” topped the scales at over 190 lbs at less than 5’7” and had the audacity to say he works out at the same gym I go to everyday. My friend Eric and I aren’t speaking after this little fiasco of a hook-up, but suffice to say that I took the initiative to speak to this man on the phone first and he purported to be in shape and simply stocky. We met for a late cup of coffee – my idea of getting a look at the goods before proceeding to a more meaningful date. As I entered the restaurant and “Ryan” rose from the table to shake my hand, I found myself looking at the top of his head – clearly not 5’7” since I’m 5’7” – and unless his scale only went as far as 190, “Ryan” had apparently stopped weighing himself before going on a year-long eating binge. Before you label me judgmental, let me say that it’s a matter of preference; Preference and the feeling that if you misrepresent yourself, you set yourself up for disaster. Making matters worse, “Ryan” went on and on about how he keeps a meticulous diet, works out 5 days a week and doesn’t really have anything other than water after 6 p.m. Call me cruel, but I ordered cheese fries and inhaled them while he droned on and on about how he maintains this self-observed heavenly physique. When the check came I looked at “Ryan” with eyes that blazed – liar pays. I’ve spoken to “Ryan” twice since our little meeting and I think we both know that the only way we’ll meet each other again is at a White Castle drive-thru window at 2 a.m.

It’s Not for the Sex
Barrington Psychiatrist Scott Haltzman found that by age 45, two out of five married men cheat (40%), while one out of every five married women cheated (20%). What was more telling about Haltzman’s study was that the majority of the participants of the study said it wasn’t about the sex. Virtually all participants said they cheated because they were looking for love and affection.

On Blast
Honestly, what would be your reason? With statistics showing that so many people cheat and the majority saying that sex was NOT the main issue, what would your reason be? Hypothetically of course…would you cheat to enjoy a night of steamy sex or would your infidelity be based on receiving love and/or affection?

Keep passin’ the open windows…

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

My reason for cheating would be for attention. The sex is the bomb but with busy schedules, it is sometimes hard to get the attention one desires.

KahluaLoverInVa said...

I've always been a faithful woman when in a committed relationship...but I would never cheat just for sex. It would definitely be because I'm not getting the attention and/or affection I need. ~~Kahlua~~

Cocoa Rican said...

Keepin’ it real… in the end I’m a man. I’ve cheated for both reasons and although I hope never to cheat again – assuming I’d be in a relationship again – it would only be for the sex. If I’m not getting the affection, attention and love I need at home, then the relationship is OVER! So, long story short (I know….too late) I’d only cheat for the hot, butt-naked-monkey love that comes from doin’ wrong, but feelin’ so right! ROFL... speakin' of which... wassup Fluff?

Anonymous said...

so I creep yeah...just keep it on the down low

Anonymous said...

why would you want to have sex with Monkeys. THats beastiality and thats gross. Ewwww.

Cocoa Rican said...

So let me get this right, your roots are blonde and you rode the short bus, right? I mean, damn!

Anonymous said...

I would love to cheat with Caspar. I think she`s Crazy, but Crazy people have Crazy SEX! Jeff.