Tuesday, September 19, 2006

Morning Edition - 9/19/06

On Blast
A lesson in friendship….
You’re born into your family, you’re forced to get along with your colleagues, but you choose your friends. Sometimes friendships need to be evaluated to determine if they still serve their purpose. Friendship is camaraderie. Your friends should respect your values, be honest with you when you call on their advice and love you through your faults. There are times when friends grow apart or come to a fork in the road that defines where their friendship will go. It is at these times that some relationships take an odd course and the partnership turns into a power struggle that defies the boundaries of trust, loyalty and respect. When these times occur, we can sometimes confuse true friendship and the overwhelming desire to maintain something that is merely safe in its longevity. In short, friendship is not defined by time or our shared history. Friendship is defined by our ability to share our lives with like souls. Recognize the difference between your acquaintances and your friends. Most importantly, know when the actions of your “friends” speak to the quality of your relationship.

Have you had an instance when the actions of a “friend” have made you call to question your relationship? Did you determine that you wanted to continue this relationship or did you terminate the friendship?

Keep passin’ the open windows…


Anonymous said...

Yes, I've had a few "friends" that have caused me to raise my eyebrow. I'll speak specifically on one that I truly love. She's a great person, but we're just different. She's heavily into church and I'm not. Being around her became strained, because I smoke and drink (socially), and I curse (hourly). I'm a good person BUT I don't like being judged. To date, we haven't been in contact and it's been 6 years or so, however, if I see her, we'll pick back up on our inside jokes and fond memories and cackle like we did in the old days.


P.S. The "links" section on your blog are driving me crazy. Let me know if you want help remvoing it!!!

Just Me said...

I can't remember terminating any friendship. I have had people go against my gain and rub me the wrong way. When this happens over-and-over, I just push them back to a more comfortable distance. I believe that we are ALL not the same and the all have something to offer others but, we only need a very limited number of true people in our life to be fulfilled.

Dayne Avery said...

In reality people sometimes grow apart. I can recall several friendships where at one age we had everything in common, then years later we had nothing in common. Once hanging out with them would be so fun then down the line its like "why am I friends with you again???"

Anonymous said...

Yes, there were a group of people that I considered "friends" but at every turn in one way or another it was shown that I was merely a pawn in a sad game. I chose to "terminate" a number of these "friends" at one time. What I thought would cause me pain has brought me peace. I sometimes miss the group activities but feel no remorse in removing the "ill feelings" that the relationships caused. I bear no ill feelings towards any of them, on the contrary I wished the "friendships" could have gone on forever or maybe they would have questioned my actions, but none never did. In the long run it hasnt mattered, sometimes you have to do what you feel in your heart is in the best interests of your well being, whether it be spiritually, emotionally or physically.

caspar608 said...

Alright Cocoa, I get it. So you're cutting me off for not coming to your party last Friday _ I thought I told you I was two steps from death. Anyway, I would like to sing this song to you before we part ways. Perhaps I am not your preference of friend. WHatever the case may be...I heard a song about it...like to hear it? Here it goes......

written by John Lennon and Paul McCartney

There are places I remember all my life,
Though some have changed,
Some forever, not for better,
Some have gone and some remain.

All these places had their moments
With lovers and friends I still can recall.
Some are dead and some are living.
In my life I've loved them all.

But of all these friends and lovers,
There is no one compares with you,
And these memories lose their meaning
When I think of love as something new.

Though I know I'll never lose affection
For people and things that went before,
I know I'll often stop and think about them,
In my life I'll love you more.

Though I know I'll never lose affection
For people and things that went before,
I know I'll often stop and think about them,
In my life I'll love you more.

Goodbye and God Bless,
aka Colleen
aka Crazy White Bi*&h
aka Colleen Abdul Jabbar
aka Sophias Momma
aka Skate Off

Anonymous said...

I have never terminated a friendship because to me that wouldn't reflect to well on the choices I've made as to who will be in my life. However, due to actions and in some cases lack of actions, I have taken away the title of friend and consider them to be either an acquaintance or an associate.


Anonymous said...

I fall in Love with people:not that “Love Making” kind of Love you feel for you partner, husband, wife, etc. but, Love of a soul and spirit. Once I’m in Love it takes a whole lot for me to fall out of Love. But, I have learned to master the art of Loving from a distance, while holding on to what is real and Loving them just because…

“I Love you just because I do”…Anita Barker


caspar608 said...

awwwww. J'Moo that was so sweet.

But are you goin to cut me deep if we get into it?

Cocoa Rican said...

I attempt to fix the relationship first and communicate how I feel, but when all else fails, I cut a mutha off! What can I say, I'm older, weary and my patience are short. I believe after I've communicated what we should work on, it's time to take action! The difference is, I will warn those I consider close, while I will just chop a friendship at the root if we weren't tight.

Tammy said...

Well, I've had someone who called me friend, but seems everytime something happened, she chose to blame everyone around her without taking any of the blame herself. The last incident where she totally flipped out over something that she imagined she blamed the whole group (again)and decided we were not her friends. Since this seemed to be a pattern for her, I decided to just let it be. It was just to exhausting. I wish her well.