Wednesday, August 01, 2007

Afternoon Edition - 8/1/07

DMV; The Reason for the New 8-Year Renewal Process in NYC
There is something to be said about the service delivery and lack of logical behavior at the Department of Motor Vehicles. Granted, it is a government agency where I’m sure we’re not paying Shakeema, Lolita, Tyreek, Jose and Susan top dollar for their stellar interpersonal skills and professionalism, but can they act as though they’re at the workplace getting paid to perform some type of duty? The long prelude is to openly speak about my experience at the DMV today. I arrived just as the doors opened and was promptly given directions to another location by the security guard, since the DMV location I visited would not process my out-of-state driver’s license and provide me with the Big Apple version. Not sooner than I walked through the doors of the next DMV location when Juwan – I ain’t even making this up, his green and white state issued work ID said, “Juwan Jackson” – asked me to grab a blue and white form and stand in the line to my right. “…but you don’t even know what I’m here for AND I filled-out an on-line form to avoid writing anything during my visit today,” I said. The condescending look I gave him had him step back and say, “Well, uh…bruh, whatchu here for?” I read the signs over his head and said, “I don’t need help thanks.” I walked over to the licensing area and waited for close to an hour. This wouldn’t have been as “serious” as it sounds, but there were less than 10 people in line ahead of me. Fatima, Jayqueeda, Fuquaisha and Lola all joked, openly flirted and ate, while we all stared from behind the ropes in disbelief. All their smiles and chatter disappeared once any customer approached them. They then became stone-faced, bad-weaved fools. When I reached Jayqueeda and furnished my paperwork for the license conversion, she looked me in the face and said, “Fix yo’ face boi…” When I didn’t crack a smile, she became very nervous and visibly irritated. “Well damn. You havin’ a bad day Mr. X?” she continued. “Not until I got here…uh… Jayqueeda [I squinted to read her state ID buried between her sagging breast]. Seems you ladies have a party all day long while working people wait for you guys to get your acts together,” I said in a hushed-I’ll-kill-your-kids tone. She backed up, tapped her itchin-and-flakin’ weave several times. “I’ll get your mean behind out of here as soon as possible,” she mumbled. I smiled and said, “That’s what I like to hear boo-boo. I’m not trying to wreck the flow here at the DMV club, but I have to make my own paper today.” She smiled that so-youz-a-nasty-little-b*tch-ass smile before completing my application process. When she handed me my completed (but picture-less) temporary license, I said, “You girls are a real class act. Normally it would take a night at the bowling alley to meet ladies of your stature. Thanks for all your upstanding help.” My face held a tight smirk that usually sends chills up the spines of serial killers, but Ms. Jay was not amused. “Go on before I have your license revoked,” she laughed. I began my sarcastic giggle before saying “…or I demand more cuts be made to DMV’s budget since they’re obviously overstaffed and under worked,” my laughter growing louder and dripping with sarcasm – I even tapped my right hand on her counter, while holding my stomach with my left hand to punctuate how much my own joke had tickled me. When I looked back at Jayqueeda, she was standing shoulder-to-shoulder with Fuquaisha and by the chicken-necking going on she was apparently filling her in on our little exchange. I did the happy gay-boy wave to both the ghetto-girls of DMV, brought my shades down from my head to my eyes and gave Butch-queen-runway-stroll out of there. I won’t see those fools for another eight years…even then it will be too soon.

On Blast

As I recall, the Department of Motor Vehicles (or Motor Vehicles Association) isn’t much different in any state. In light of the flagrant misuse of perceived power, shouldn’t we as consumers DEMAND that our state do something to revamp the Department of Motor Vehicles so that they operate as any other money generating business does? How can we stop/change a state-run monopoly?

Keep passin’ the open windows…


That Dude Right There said...

Well DAMN. I'm glad that I live in Dekalb County in Georgia. I got my license in about 30 minutes and my tag (license plate to you Northerners) in 15 minutes. And I didn't have to wait in the mail for either!

EsLocura said...

nene, you haven't lived until you try to change your Boston license to a Puerto Rican license. It took 7.5 hours and I had to see an attorney. I also spent way too much time trying to explain why I only used a first and last name in Boston verses the several names I should have if in fact I was a true Puerto Rican.

Darius T. Williams said...

LOL - I remember trying to get my license in NJ. It was such a fool that I just kept my Illinois license. I'm not sure how you can stop it - it's just the way it is I guess. it's a fool here too - I have to have mine renewed because it expires in December. I'm literally dreading that trip to the DMV.

Kensilo said...

Dang, You guys have eight years until renewal? MD only has 6yrs.
As far as customer service at the DMV they need professional people at the counter leave the chicken-heads in the brackground.

Anonymous said...

DEMAND to speak to a supervisor and ask for names. I even thought about having a petition outside of the DMV offices. How were you treated while you were here? Etc.

Unfortunately many people in Civil Service jobs - for the most part - act with very little professional courtesy simply because they believe their jobs are protected either by a union or a quota.

Jayqhana and Fatima obviously have tapped/banged their weaves too often and have suffered a tremenendous amount of brain damage as a result, not to mention the mold contamination festering in their weaves from the combination of moisture and synthetic hair (wake up ladies, the korean beauty supply store is NOT selling real human hair). That mold is seeping into the poors in their scalp as we read this blog which also causes health problems - so the whole dmv beast club you encountered yesterday should merely be classified as mildly retarded - which definitely fills a quota as far as equal opportunity is concerned. See, your good....aside from the fact that I have a big round firm booty and real boobies to match, I would have flipped my very real mid back length of auburn hair and told them they would be much more attractive if they behaved like ladies and less like inhabitants of the Bronx Zoo. When all was said and done, they would have gone home and took a deep, long, self loathing look in the mirror and maybe decided to behave in a more ladylike, professional manner going forward, lest they get cut down by another CUSTOMER. I could care less what shade you are, respect me, respect my money and we can keep it movin. Have a lovely day. The End.

I say fire anyone who doesn't treat the customer with respect.

Mr. Jones said...

At least its not the post office.

yet another black guy said...

that's why i only go to dmv's in predominantly white neighborhoods. they never have attitude problems because, unlike minorities, white folks will speak to a higher up when treated badly.

the majority of dmv's i've been in have been drastically understaffed. it's like this: they know you need it, so it doesn't matter how long you'll wait, you will wait it out.