Morning Edition - 8/20/07

And Then There Were Three
Friday evening BD and I headed out from the office and had dinner before calling it a night. He excitedly announced that we would get together Saturday and he would cook dinner and make it a movie night. It sounded like a welcome plan since we were both looking forward to a night of chilliin’. Unfortunately, the Mini’s mom did not keep to her plan of keeping the kid and when I spoke with BD on Saturday he was frustrated and upset that he had to cancel our plans. I repeatedly mentioned that I wasn’t at all put-out by the cancellation and that he shouldn’t worry about having our night some other time. By Sunday, BD was tight (street-speak for really pissed-off) and said he was going to take a cab ride over to Mini’s mom’s house to drop the kid. He was especially upset at the Mini being disappointed by the lack of attention from his mom. I told BD I’d drive him over, since if the mom was there we could just have our dinner date after all. As the Mini and BD got in the car I greeted both and nervously smiled and made small talk on our way to the mom’s crib. As luck would have it, she wasn’t home and looking at the Mini’s face when he returned to the car, I saw he was distraught. We drove a couple of blocks before I heard his soft sighs and whimpers. I looked in my rearview mirror to see the tears streaming down his face and immediately pulled over and asked BD to sit in the back seat with him to comfort him. I suddenly felt an enormous pang of anger as I watched BD with the Mini in his arms trying to explain that mommy was “probably just really busy…” How can a mom do this, I thought. Then suddenly I knew I had to be the one to change the mood. I remembered that BD said that the Mini absolutely loves Burger King. “I don’t know about you guys, but I could sure eat some BKs right about now,” I said. The Mini looked at me and smiled through his tears. “What do you think,” I continued. “Yeah…let’s have Burger King,” the Mini screeched. For the record, I absolutely hate Burger King and the food gives me menstrual-like cramps, but someone had to take one for the team. We ordered our meals, sat down and shared our fries and onion rings with our burgers. I laughed and made silly jokes and the Mini and I connected in a way that I never thought would happen so soon. Immediately afterward, the Mini said we should get some ice cream from the next door Baskin Robbins shop. “That’s enough…unless you’re going to pay, we’re not having ice cream,” BD playfully said to the Mini. “Here’s my plan…” I immediately chimed in. “You’ll distract the lady behind the counter and tell her you can’t find your daddy,” my animation grew as I continued my instructions, “while you have her distracted I’ll jump behind the counter and scoop out our favorite ice cream and we’ll run to the car,” I finished. The Mini laughed and said, “You’re nuts. I don’t think we can pull it off.” “Nonsense,” I said, serious and determined. “Just remember the plan and stay in character.” As we reached the door to the Baskin Robbins, BD said, “Fine, I’ll pay for the darn ice cream!” I looked at the Mini and winked, “See, we got our ice cream!” He started chuckling and dangled off my arm as we chose our favorite flavors. We then sat in the shop window and took spoonfuls of each other’s cups as we chuckled away and acted silly. I looked over at BD and he was smiling, but his eyes were filled with tears. He mouthed the words, “Thank you.” We left the parlor and hit the sneaker shop for some window shopping, the Mini riding piggy back and joking with me the entire time. When I finally pulled up to BD’s place to drop them off, the Mini asked if I was coming in. He seemed excited – like he had made a new best friend. “Nah…you guys go ahead, I have a lot to do at home,” I said. “Please call me when you get home. You just don’t know how I’m feeling right now,” BD said. As I drove home I was still disappointed that the Mini had to experience a neglectful mom, but I understood that some things happen for a reason. I was given the opportunity to meet the Mini and be myself because it was such an impromptu meeting. It was one of the most fulfilling experiences I’ve had in recent memory. BD called shortly after I got in and said, “I’m so glad you two hit it off so well and I immediately saw your paternal instincts kick-in. You just don’t know how much it meant for you to turn this afternoon around and more even that the Mini likes you so much.” I felt a frog in my throat and simply said, “The pleasure was all mine. Thank you for sharing him with me.” He then said, “The Mini asked me where you live…” I said, “Tell him I live right here…” and point to your chest, I instructed. Yeah, looks like we’re officially at stage 3.

On Blast
This relationship – and yeah, I think I should start looking at it that way – is completely different from anything I’ve experienced in the past. It holds so many different facets – physical lust, emotional fulfillment and now the sense of me as part of a family unit. I’m so grateful and full to be where I am right now. I’m feeling that my past was preparing me for BD and this moment.
How do you believe your past has prepared you to appreciate and enjoy where you are today?

Keep passin’ the open windows…

Listening to: If You Asked Me To